✖ 867-5309: Jenny ✖

by Tommy Tutone

I just have to talk about this website that allows you to register for a “slave number”, for a fee of course. I’m not going to link to it because I refuse to in any way shape or form promote such an atrocity… but I’m sure you’ve seen the numbers posted in a profile near you. Can someone please clarify for me the meaning of a randomly generated number that a computer issues you? How this proves anything? Validates anything whatsoever? In my opinion, it’s utterly meaningless. Their tagline should be, “By posers, for posers.” I mean, it’s not like this is something acknowledged universally: this is a marketing angle, people! Hello! As ridiculous as Bloodlines…

Since having some random number seems to be such a vital part of proving that one is a “real sub”, I have decided that *my* “slave number” will now and forever be: 867-5309.

For a good time call…